Humor

| ZeroHedge

by

This is hilarious!   by Tyler Durden on 08/30/2012 12:53 -0400Ben Bernanke RealityAs Bernanke and Draghi carefully try to centrally-plan navigate us mere mortals through this dismal period of market and economic reality, we thought this clip was a perfect analogy for the heavy-lifting job they are doing… and the likely outcome.Note the rather entertaining gentleman running for cover on the left – the long-only talking-heads? via Luxury Yacht Down: What Happens When Central-Craning Goes Horribly Wrong | ZeroHedge.

Immediate Solution To Debt Crisis Found: Italian police seize $6 trillion of fake U.S. bonds

by

What started off as a harmless Mafia loan-sharking investigation turned into a rather profitable seizure of $6 trillion worth of forged US Treasury bonds on Friday.  Oddly enough, no rally in the treasury market as a result.  US officials confirmed that the bonds were not just a misplaced QE 3 and QE 4. “It began as a investigation into mafia loan-sharking, but gradually expanded as prosecutors used telephone and computer intercepts to unearth evidence of illegal activity surrounding Treasury bonds.  The fake securities, worth more than a third of U.S. national debt, were seized in January from a Swiss trust … Read more

Iran To Give Back Drone As A Toy

by

Iran Says It Will Give Back The Downed US Sentinel Drone — As A Toy Model Is Iran’s display of a sense of  humor a break in the tension between the two Nations or an attempt to belittle the American military in the eyes of Iranian citizens?  I think the $4 price tag suggests the latter.. After losing the RQ-170 drone in the skies over Iran in November, the White House first admitted the drone was real, and then further outraged the Iranians by asking for it back. With a burst of Irony, Tehran has agreed to comply, but instead … Read more

CHART OF THE DAY: 18-24 Year Olds Send 55 Texts Per Day On Average

by

You don’t have to look any further to find out what’s wrong with this country. Too many people are wasting time texting.   CHART OF THE DAY: 18-24 Year Olds Send 55 Texts Per Day On Average According to the Pew Internet project, people in the 18-24 year-old range are sending and receiving 110 texts per day on average. The median number of texts sent/received by that group is 50 per day. The overall average for texting per day amongst cell phone users is 42, says Pew. That number is flat compared on a year over year basis. Pew interviewed … Read more

Does anyone have one of these laying around?

by

1923 Leica 0-series becomes world’s most expensive camera, fetches $1.89 million at auction from Engadget by Sean Hollister Just when we thought ancient wooden boxes were all the rage among camera collectors, a compact beauty has shattered our theories — this 1923 Leica 0-series just sold at auction for €1,320,000, or about 1.89 million in US money. Curiously enough, the exact same auction house reportedly sold the exact same camera four years ago: No. 107, the first Leica to be exported, allegedly for a patent application inspection in New York. In 2007, it fetched a relatively paltry €336,000, which was … Read more

New Wall St. Slogans to replace the aged “Sell in May & go Away”

by

Check out this great clip of proposed replacement sayings for that old adage of “Sell in May and go away.” Here are a few of my favorites: “Buy today’s cause it’s early May“, “Buy tomorrow with funds you borrow“, “Buy all commodities without hesitation, but don’t dare we have inflation“, “Buy the REITs cause real estate is on fire, but don’t you dare become an actual home buyer” What is your favorite?   [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FHWqIneWY4&feature=player_embedded&h=400&w=500]

Charlie Sheen Shorts Berkshire Hathaway. Proves you can still make a killing in the market while wasted.

by

The Sax Angle created a hypothetical portfolio for Charlie Sheen.  Our extensive backtesting proves you can still get wasted and make a killing in the stock market.

Charlie Sheen’s stock portfolio produced enormous gains while his career floundered.   That’s the conclusion that the analysts at the SAX  ANGLE came to while building a hypothetical portfolio of Charlie Sheen’s stock holdings.  Based on public information, TV shows, and extensive web gossip, we concluded that Charlie Sheen should own or control significant stock in nine companies, some private and public.

1. Playboy Enterprises– PLA.A

Charlie Sheen should get involved in a group offering a rival bid to Hugh Hefner’s attempt to take Playboy (PLA) Enterprise private.  Once a sought out guest of the Playboy Mansion, Charlie should plan behind the scenes to throw out its namesake owner. Once his buyout group gets control of Playboy, we suggest that Charlie plan to move into the mansion and mummify Hef and display him wax figure like descending the entrance stairs.

2. Laboratory Holdings- LH

Sheen should work with the drug testing giant’s research lab to make drug tests anyone can pass.  Charlies should direct his agent to make a deal for him to be the spokesperson for the new “Easy Pass Come Clean Machine.”

3.  Betty Ford Clinic Buyout

Read more